Thursday, May 27, 2010

In a soup...

The roaring of the clouds, the lightning in the skies and the sound of the pouring rain. A great band it seems even though i do not enjoy it. Rain kinda makes me feel depressed. It gives me a sense of helplessness and captivity but back in my native place its the other way around. Mother Nature always startles us....

I am particularly happy with a friend of mine who encouraged my free spirit to write. Even though i remain skeptical how people react if by any chance they go through my lines, he tried to conciliate my mind. Even he is hooked to this love for writing and perhaps understands the nuances better then me thus helping me..Got a good feeling...Thank you my friend.

The rain isn't showing any stop sign. I am yawning and wondering if any soup can lift my mood. Well then i have to dig in my refrigerator shelves hoping to find some veggies for my soup. I am not planning any elaborate soup since my stock is limited yet let me try. If by chance you feel hungry and want a bowl of soup please feel free to let me know. (Grins.......)

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Tuning In......

Watching a musical show on television where the singers are singing all my favorites...How cool isn't it? Some songs which are really close to my heart while some are foot tapping. Songs which brings so many thoughts across the mind. Some which goes back to the college days when we would check with our friends whether they have the CD of the same or they liked the composition. Man, good old days. It was so damn fun!!!

I remember a particular song which one of the singers is currently singing used to be a hot favorite one of my closest friends. She used to keep on humming the lines much to the annoyance of others in the circle. We used beg her to sing some other song and even her boyfriend did not fight shy to gift her a copy of some other song so that so that she could outgrow the particular song. How funny!!! A batch mate who used to wear a forlorn look due to his untimely break up used to to sing some broken hearted songs. Boys hardly spared him from pulling his leg. Poor fella!!!

Songs, such a wonderful creation which reaches straight to the heart and comes from the heart as well is replete with all the emotions of life. I love songs of all genre and wish more audible songs comes up so that we can keep loving and falling in love with wonderful compositions!!!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Unsaid words...

My current favorite song has been playing for then past few days and now my husband isn't really happy. I have been playing it at an unwanted volume and somehow he has developed a distaste for this song. But sorry, i can't help. To top it i have been humming the lyrics much to his displeasure...grins......

No two people think alike so how can we have a similar taste!!! Hopefully you will agree with me. The last weekend can perhaps provide a silent testimony to this fact. Differing is perhaps not harmful, on the contrary if we do not grow keeping aside our differences that might prove to be abysmal.

I am no preacher and neither do i want to be ostentatious with my thoughts. But i really want to divulge deep into my mind in order to get answers to lot of unsaid thoughts and queries. Can anyone read between the lines????

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Dark tunnel....

Just when i thought that i have managed to hold myself from walking through some dark tunnels in my life i have once again been diverted to that same route. This route is perhaps everyone meets while walking through the path of life. All wise men have said that we are on a sojourn on this earth and God has sent us with a purpose. This journey starts form our mothers womb to the funeral and throughout this journey we cross several paths. While a toddler parents help in navigating our ways but as we step in our adolescence we decide our ways. How many of us can boast of choosing all the scrupulously ways? There have been many moments when we have been tempted to chose a path where people accompany us only to a certain distance and perhaps leave us in the lurch. We cry, we sob but can only hear our voices echo from some corner of that lonely path. Huh!!! Again its those benevolent people whom we never payed any heed or our affectionate friends who bring us back to see the sunshine.

Walking alone in the journey of life is painful. We need to be surrounded by scrupulous people who can stand by us through any predicament. Those people can be friends, family, spouse or at times children. I know i might be sounding a bit low while writing this but i have closely seen some people who could never return to normalcy after taking a way which wasn't their destination. Life never gave them a second chance and they lost whatever they took pride in. Good family, friends, love...How i wish they could have read or felt those silent insinuations that life tried to provide. Their torpid state of mind only sends doleful vibes.

We always do not need magnanimous people to be with us but let us try and appreciate those people who think for us care for us and above all want us always to be happy in life. Life and relationship is bound to be beautiful, trust me!!!!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Pain of cooking...

We all eagerly wait for the weekends and even before we realize it flies out..phew!!!! Gosh, my poor back...its hurting from entire day's of cleaning and dusting. I am a cleanliness freak and at times the results are painful, trust me. My husband's abysmal sense of maintaining his wardrobe also adds some work to my cart. He also says i babble when i have a hard day's of work. So i decided to write. Earlier i loved to scribble but now the modern inventory items have given way.

A friend of mine recently wrote a superb blog about his cooking experiences.I thoroughly enjoyed when he narrated his heroic experiences in the kitchen. The vegetable cocktails, the salad dressings (some of the wackiest) the choice of meat with some unusual herbs and spices, i couldn't help stop laughing. He was very candid in declaring the fact that not all of these turned out to be savory but nevertheless he had to gulp them them down. Downside of a bachelor life i guess. A lot of friends who can safely say they know cooking provided him their contact numbers so that he can visit them over the weekends to have a proper meal. My friend's nightmare was when he had some chicken which wasn't thoroughly cooked and ended up suffering from stomach disorders.

Cooking is both a pleasure and a pain. While some people who have mastered the art love to dole out dishes for their loved ones while there are others like this poor friend of mine who keep on experimenting and landing in a soup. While there are others like us who cook but have a desire to cook to cook something memorable. Good luck to all the people with their recipes. Hope you win everyone's heart!!!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Wandering Mind...

Immediately after our marriage my husband passed a very useful tip. Please don't let your minds wander!!! He said never in life try to please everyone, u will end up making yourself sad. People will overlook your effort and pounce upon you for your mistakes. I can vehemently say he was just too correct. Today i exactly experienced the same feeling. People around me were happy but somewhere in my heart i couldn't persuade myself because in my opinion i couldn't cater to everyone's wishes!!!

May be these are just some frivolous thoughts but it takes a while to coax and cajole to come in tandem with rationality. Mind and heart just wanders and i do not seem to have their reins in my hands. At every step life just opens a package full of surprises which at times i find too hard to react. I wonder at times why can't our parents stay with us forever to guide us to provide solace whenever our minds wander? I know they can't..huh..

The oddity of my husband's statement is that it is true and i have to abide by it if do not want further heart aches. So what if somebody doesn't like me, my face, my home, my family and on and on. I cannot stop living my life. I have to live my life fruitfully so that on one winter afternoon when i sit idly on my recliner i can rejoice in the fact that i have lived life to the hilt. I will pass my tears and tensions so that wrinkles and crinkles stay at bay...lol..But my last and emphatic word will be 'thanks' to all those people who have made me realize`this facet of life. Cheers!!!

Leniency and Clemency

The drizzle outside has added chill to the weather and i am savoring my tomato cream soup. yum yum!!! The aromatic herbs have added a distinct flavor to its taste. Though my salad plate isn't looking cheerful yet i have managed to have a few morsels.

In my last blog i wished for a bright sunny day but the weather today is depressing. I called up my parents this morning only to be saddened by some unwanted news. These news even though they aren't connected to me yet makes its impact felt. The repercussions are always deep. Let me end this topic here.

I have learnt one very important lesson from life--clemency. Even though i am still at an infantile stage when it comes to discuss life yet in my short span, life has taught me the art of clemency even though my memory never wipes them off...i wonder at times how i grew with my every mistake. At times these seem so funny, yet every mistake in the kitchen taught me the proportion of the condiments. I remember the first time i cooked my father encouraged to cook more but my brother laughed his lungs out. Not to mention about the food.

Leaving aside the funny side the`stoical part of me has definitely emerged. I think i should wind up for the day as too many adjectives isn't good for my mind..lol!!!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Simplicity

This weekend i was surrounded by a few close family friends whom i would like to term them as jovial. It's always nice to be surrounded by people who radiate positivity and fun. Their simple outlook towards life and their uncomplicated nature persuaded me to meet them sometime very soon. I admire their simplicity and their gentle hearts.

There are umpteen moments in our lives when we yearn for some light moments, a kind smile, a shoulder to rest or rather places where we can seek some solace. But difficult times drifts us away from those things. We all go through lean phases in our lives and these light moments gives us the strength to walk through.

Well, today's writing is perhaps reflecting the dull weather outside. It's a gloomy day and laziness is creeping upon me. Wanted to go for a siesta but some queer thoughts is irking me which i cannot fathom. I want to put them at rest. Often i ask myself, why cant we always be happy? I will answer myself. Mood is just like weather, though the key to happiness lies within us. If there is no winter we cannot appreciate the summer or welcome the rains. Back in my hometown after a day of scorching heat we pray for rains so that we get some unperturbed sleep. This is life perhaps. We crib for other people's possession rather than being happy with whatever we have. We fail to appreciate when we have those moments and shed tears when those moments pass away.

But peeping outside the window i am feeling that the evening should pass early so that another bright sunny day ushers in...Have a great evening or good night my friends...

Friday, May 7, 2010

It's weekend folks

Awww Friday...when most of the people rejoice that its time for another weekend and hit the pubs and restaurants, we choose to have vegetarian food on this day. No compulsion albeit voluntary !!! Lots of veggies, lentils and desserts minus eggs...The tradition has almost been passed on to me by my mother-in-law without any obligations and i gleefully agreed to it.

When it comes to mothers every string of our hearts are attached. Epitome of love, compassion and i can go on and on yet i will fall short of adjectives describing mother. As an old saying which says that God cannot be everywhere so he created mothers. How true!!!! I cannot pinpoint any occasion when i miss her the most but whenever i fall sick i miss her gentle touch, her presence. No medicine perhaps cannot perhaps meet her healing touch. This is one stop place where i can shed tears, find solace, comfort and inner strength to carry on.

Life is so strange, i believe!!! When i used to be at 'my' home with my mother i always fought over food insisting on that wasn't made as per my requirements. Now years after when i cook for my family, i realize how inconsiderate i have been towards her at times. But she is my mother. She forgave all and happily rustled up something else to satisfy my taste buds!!! I miss her so much.. Wish i had listened to all her wise words. lol!!!

As mentioned earlier its friday i cannot pamper myself or indulge in my favorite pizza. Yet i am planning to make something invigorating. Hmm, i am thinking and before my thoughts take me to some other planet here's wishing everyone a happy weekend!!!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Treasured thoughts.......

My school friend after quite some time called me up and we had a long chat. Old memories brought back. Memories are such a wonderful thing only if it doesn't haunt. Lol!!! We discussed our school days, crushes and infatuation our present lives, and brooding over the fact that we do not get to meet. We laughed and enjoyed our conversation thoroughly....

I can describe from my own experiences how memories at times become ailment nurturing our sad heart. There are times when i miss my home and parents and that is when i remind myself of the time when we shared so many wondrous years. Those days will never be back but those memories shall ever remain green in my garden of memories....They say, experience is the best teacher, but in my opinion parents are the best guide. The untold words, the suppressed emotions, the perplexed or bewildered thoughts can be easily fathomed by them. These memories i can safely say we all love to cherish.

Not all memories are pleasant. As mentioned earlier some memories can be haunting as well. There are memories we really want to bury in some corner of our heart but some how some circumstances makes those memories creep. Let our determination be the shield which can protect our present from any unwanted memories. My brother-in-law says he wants to forget an epoch of his life or say as to say a few chapters of his life. I wonder will running away from those memories help? I have never been coy rather i have been a very docile person who doesn't want all memories to pent up in my heart. They can safely be stored in some part of my brain and can be used as reference as and only when need arises!!!

A lot of things are popping in my mind now. Some treasured memories i can share whereas some (u guessed it right) i can't!!! Till i make up mind what i can share here i end now a bit abruptly!!!!

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Heart Pangs.....

I woke up to a bright sunny day and this really makes me happy. The splendid day allured me to venture out. But before making further plans i sat in front of my machine to send an email to my cousin wishing him all the good luck for his upcoming exam. While i was about to log out someone pinged me at one of the social sites. The name appeared unfamiliar to me and most importantly it was evident it was pseudonym. While i was unwilling to divulge any details i recognised once when she introduced me to herself...Of course she could sense my insecurity and she made some extra efforts to convince me. Her name was almost chucked out from my memory (grins!!!!)

Well, she used to be one of our batch mates but due to her fathers posting she didn't continue with us. The epoch was too short for sure. She launched an avalanche of questions and i patiently answered them giving too less time to ask her something. The biggest question was when she saw my marital status!! She didn't forget to congratulate though our chatting continued.....

Last heard a few years ago, courtesy all the social networking sites, she got married to the person she was in love with. I remember a few of her uninvited acquaintances raised a toast wishing her a prosperous married life. Somehow i managed to tilt the set of questions towards her. I asked her about her post marital life. Unfortunately i could not read between the lines. It was only when i tried to pull her leg inquiring if she had started her own family, i could gauge her silence. I realized that the couple broke up sometime after their marriage. I cursed my imbecility. I apologized and she was quick to forgive me.. After some revelations of her personal life i could feel her void tone. I tried to provide her some comfort with my words and promised to be in touch...

Later in the day i went to the delicatessen to get some veggies but somehow her words lingered in my mind. The pain of separation can never be explained but only be felt. As they say, 'only the wearer knows where the shoe pinches.'

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Dinner Time...

Different people different taste. You may be wondering what on earth am i exactly talking about? I had a family as guests over dinner at my home a few days back. Since this was the first time i was meeting them i made sure and ensured that everything was just the perfect. The food, the table, cleanliness of my petite sitting area. I enjoy cooking but rustling up something for novice is sure a hard hitting task. Since i wasn't too familiar with their taste buds i decided to play safe with my tried and tested recipes. Nevertheless it involved same amount of time and effort.

Once they arrived, we all spent some time to prattle about showbiz, to weather, to culture, to sports and whatever our minds could possibly discuss. The couple looking dapper in their respective dresses along with their four year old son, shared their parenthood experiences and the pang and anxiety that goes in bringing up a child. The kid kept his parents on toes as well as entertaining us with his facetious activities. Then came the dinner time and i just pressed my fingers with the hope that they like the food which i later realized made indentations.

Well, most of my items really went off well with them and i could gauge that looking at their plates. But my poor salmon dish suffered. Somehow they unanimously do not like salmon and it just lay at one corner of the table. Even they were generous with their apologetic words yet my effort in that dish went waste. Poor me!!!!! Somehow i relieved my mind from brooding and asked my husband to help them with the sweet dish. My husband has perhaps more that one sweet tooth and he always emphasizes on sweet dishes. The kid of course had more food on the wooden surface and the carpet rather than on his plate. He was probably interested in chocolate ice cream which i offered him as bribe on the condition if he had a few morsel. After the dinner we spent some more time before they left.

The next day was spent cleaning the floor. I also realized that it is impossible in life to keep up to everyone's expectations. But that should not deter us from trying it. We can fail but hard work in any arena never fails.......

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Freedom....

My entire body is crippled with pain from my roller coaster experience at an adventure island yesterday. Some sheer moments of fun and body wrecking.This wasn't the first time i went for some joy rides. Even in my childhood me with my family and later on with my friends would go to the local fair held once in a year. The rides used to allure me. Later in my growing years we visited places where i have been exposed to various rides. I have never been an adrenaline junkie in this regard but my yesterday's experience perhaps has changed all my notion!!!

Well i of course didn't sit on those merry-go-rounds or the usual stuff. On the contrary i was convinced by my husband and friends to sit on rides which shoots up at the height of 180 feet. Phew!!!!! It not only pops up in the air but twists and turns, throws down and takes up and then mercifully takes us down. Some unadulterated moments of thrill....

I can never jot down in words how i felt at those moments but anyone who can read my eyes will come to know at a glance. I am also aware of the fact that this isn't a huge feat considering the truth that children in their early teens were also enjoying these. Those inexplicable moments will perhaps always be moral boosters for me whenever i feel low. I can safely convince myself that if can almost kiss the sky, no work is impossible. I can soar, i can fly!!! The brains who created these rides also perhaps didn't set any limits. For them the sky was just the limit.

I wish my sense of freedom and rationality just soars higher and higher. I want to cry, i want to fly. I want to be seen, i want to sing...I want and want..Well our 'wants' never stop. So, let me stop!!!!!!